Thursday, August 22, 2013

Dear Future

To my future,

I decided that I deserve you. Let me tell you that it has been a long road to get to this point. I haven't had the gall to stand up to someone yet or really to feel the way I do now until now. But I am glad that I do. I have decided that I deserve something more. I deserve respect and honor. I deserve faithfulness and commitment. I deserve love and support. I deserve stability and consistency. I deserve you. So I have decided to leave my past behind and continue looking onward and forward into the future and continue looking for you.

This is such an odd concept for me because I have never thought to leave the past behind even when I was still tied to it. I have always cut ties first and then moved forward. It is much more difficult to move forward knowing that there is still a connection to the past. I know that this is the decision that had to be made because it is the best for my head, heart, and mostly it is the best for you - future.

I know this road has been bumpy and there have been many ups and downs. I don't know what your road has looked like. But I pray every day that when we meet that you will know that I am your future as I will know that you are mine. It is so trying this world we live in but I know that love surpasses everything and just as Jesus did I will forgive your trespasses as you will forgive mine.

Life is not about living happily ever after, but it is about living happily with one another. There is a childhood sunday school song that sings about having the joy down in my heart. This is what I think of when I think of my future. When I think of experiencing that true joy in my heart I cannot explain anything else except a heart that is overflowing.

I have so much love to give and I just really need somebody to bake for. So I'm excited for the day that comes when I can say my future has finally arrived. But, until that day arrives, I will patiently wait. I will pray for you and our relationship that will be. I will continue to grow in my faith and pray that you grow in yours. I will prepare my heart for you.

Love - your future.

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