I'm trying to sleep and my mind just won't shut off - so I'm blogging from my phone in bed.... I know - I just can't ever turn my mind off until I write it down and getting up for pen and paper right now just wouldn't suffice.
We all have expectations - whether it is of ourselves: our lives, our futures, our careers or of other people: our family, friends, loved ones, coworkers, etc.
We all get sad, let down, displeased, frustrated or dissapointed even. And then the realization sets in that either we should have known the Dissapointment was coming all along and were blinding ourselves to it or we now know that our expectations were set too high.
Is it too much to expect things of people? Should we not wish for the best and hope that we and others can live up to the expectations we and others set for us? I have always been that person that strived to live up to expectations, not necessarily a people pleasure because my expectations for myself were generally higher than the ones others set for me.
I wonder sometimes if I set too high of expectations for others because of the expectations I set for myself - am I asking or expecting too much? Am I wanting something that others cannot pro IDE- something that is not possoble for then to give?
Sometimes life is stressful and worrisome because I expect so much from myself that I know I put a lot of pressure on me - I wonder the level of pressure I put on others.
People have always told me I have a strong personality - I wonder if that is a compliment or their way of saying I come off to strong and need to time it down? I always wonder if that is a coping mechanism or if that strong personality is a gift that will someday get me somewhere.
This song from the movie Sister Act 2 just came into my mind - where they sing - if you wanna be somebody, if you wanna go somewhere, you've gotta wake up and pay attention....
I feel like sometimes in life if we are not awake and paying attention - we will miss out on being that person we are meant to be, being with the person we are meant to be with, going where we are meant to go, missing out on discovering all the adventures and journeys that have been laid out before us....
We all have expectations and we all face disappointments - but eventually we have to take the blinders off and decide whether this disappointment is something we knew and should have seen coming - or whether our expectations are unrealistic and we need to re-evaluate. Either way changes and likely sacrifices have to happen and change is not easy - we all know this - and neither are sacrifices!
But the question is... Is it worth it?